Press Release written by Lynn Thorne

He’s fighting the clock; she’s fighting the urge to go back to bed. They kiss goodbye, grab their coffee, pile into separate cars, and head out to face the day: work, dinner, Netflix, and bed. They’re your typical hetero couple living the American dream.

Only they’re not your typical hetero couple.

They’re today’s transgender couple, with one partner who’s undergone gender reassignment and one who had to come to terms with it.

For Marc Wyndham, who was born Marika, realizing he was meant to be a man was a gradual thing. Prone to a lifetime of social anxiety, Marika had always felt “different” without knowing why.

“I didn’t understand what the term ‘transgender’ meant until well into my adulthood but when I did, it just clicked,” Marc said. “I had this ‘Eureka!’ moment, where it all suddenly made sense.”

For Jennifer Wyndham, it made no sense at all. Marika’s revelation stunned her wife, who watched as Marika gradually became the man she was intended to be. The transition was confusing to Jennifer, who wasn’t sure whether she could stay in a marriage that wasn’t at all as she’d pictured it. She felt a horrible sense of loss, as though she’d been widowed.

“There was a lot of grief to go through in losing this person, and yet my spouse was still here,” Jen said.  “I couldn’t figure out why I needed to grieve when my wife was standing right in front of me.”

Her wife wasn’t standing in front of her anymore, though. Jen had to choose: have a transgender husband, or move forward without the love of her life. As Marc transformed, Jennifer was challenged to re-identify both herself and her marriage, a process that would force her to look deep inside her own psyche. She plunged into a deep depression, suffering through debilitating self-injury to ease her pain and the Anorexia Nervosa that threatened to kill her as she strove to accept her wife as her husband.


Jen’s journey is the focus of Lynn Thorne’s,  Who Am I If You’re Not You?, a new narrative nonfiction love story. Told from Jennifer’s viewpoint, the book explores transition from the partners’ perspective and begs the question: Do you fall in love with a gender or do you fall in love with a soul?

The book will launch in November but readers can order it online now at www.WhoAmIthebook.com.